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Fast Forward |
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Cast
Rehan Khan, Akshay Kapoor, Vinod Khanna chewing gum, masala or some strange eatable
Director
Zaighan Ali Zayed |
Disco khisko, right here right now. In some odd joint called Cave, there are all these hip-shaking guys who could do with a shave. They dance on their heads, toes, fingers and nails. And they dance-dance in boxing rings till you wish they would all get the hell out of there. Despair. Umm just go get a life chums.
This low-concept hip-hoparama – Fast Forward directed by Zaighan Ali Syed -- is not the kind of product you’d expect from its producer Anjum Rizvi who last year gave you the memorable A Wednesday. This must have been conceived on one of his off days. Indeed if there are similarities with the producer’s gut-buster it’s only the fact that here, too, the cast and crew suddenly land up on terraces of skyscrapers under construction. Such energy destruction.
Obviously cadged from a series of dancin’ flix including You got Served, the screenplay is relentlessly absurd. After saying hello to a couple of pigeons, the camera alights on high-profile trophies won the lord only knows how, by the boy (Rehan Khan) in bed. He wakes up, moves catatonically to street sounds like the clash of gas cylinders. Oho, his buddy (Akshay Kapoor) also suffers from road danceitis. Doctor ko bulao? No way. Docs would be astounded.
The award-winner from the bed and his pal from nowhere, then, shake, rattle and roll till they’re discovered by good ol’ Vinod Khanna, owner of Cave. For some mysterious reason, Vinod saab wants Boy Bed’s team to win over a pack called Heroes who have been long-time champs at his Cave. Oiks? Bed’s group calls itself Zeroes, Worse, they run into mega-girl issues. Sob,take out ye tissues.
Why? Why? Because Buddy loves Bed’s sister (Bhavna Pani). Not done. Now, for a streak of misogyny Boy Bed is betrayed by a Lady Travolta (Sabina Sheema). She actually steals his steps and gives them over to the Heroes. Message: always keep your dance moves in a safe deposit locker. You never know who’ll burgle your pelvis thrusts, next?
Sorry, am tempted to tell you just a wee bit more. Mahesh Manjrekar behaves like Kanhaiyalal of Mother India, insisting on quickie repayment of loans. Plus there are some bizarre flashbacks to Boy Bed’s mum pole-dancing (in Mumbaaaai?). And also to the Boy serving tea to the neo-Kanhaiyalal. Plot elements are introduced and then abandoned like incompatible lovers Incidentally, all the award trophies are eventually sold off to a raddiwala for Rs 60. Huh!
Truly the music (Akbar Sami) and the choreographers (too many to list) could have redeemed this storyless enterprise. Silver lining:the climax does have its fire and ice moments but that’s it.
Of the young cast, Rehan Khan and Akshay Kapoor are serviceable. Ditto Ms Pani and Ms Sheema. It’s Vinod Khanna, you’re worried about. What’s this fine actor doing in a Disco Nagri? Wish he’d do a Rewind instead of a Fast Forward. Enough endured.
Sat February 06, 2010, 13:55:51